The Pessimism of Age
I have always been someone who sees the worst in humanity. Greed, corruption, lust for power, lack of empathy, egotism, and so on are, at least to me, surging throughout the world. Of course I believe it’s not all bad. There are wondrous moments in life and there are truly good people who place the lifting up of humanity over their own personal comfort and safety. But it seems to me that those who are driving us down are winning. I look around longing to find the better nature of people triumphing, but I just can’t find it.
Over time this propensity to feel a sense of darkness creeping over the land has only grown more prevalent. So I recently asked myself if there is truly an increase in the dystopian nature of our culture or is it, perhaps, the knowledge that day by day I have less time on this earth. I admit that seeing the horizon line of my life is not particularly a pleasant consideration to dwell on, but even with death as a specter, I realize it is a combination of the two perspectives. Perhaps if I could convince myself it was mostly a fear of nonexistence driving this melancholia I might actually feel better, less worried about life going forth without me.
In an attempt to cheer me up, many friends will tell me the pendulum of functional to dysfunctional has always swung back and forth within human behavior. That we are just living through a time when cruelty and authoritarianism are peaking and that kindness, inclusiveness, and generosity will be making a comeback in the near future. Unfortunately I’m also a pragmatist. I have read enough books and have been able to incorporate my own observations into an overall sense of doom and gloom. Particularly with regard to the way we have treated and continue to treat our planet and the atmosphere around it. People are generally slow to react, which throughout history has stretched the timeframe between pendulum swings but has not been existential in nature. This time it’s different.
I would like to believe I’ve misread the signs. That the pendulum will indeed swing back prior to it no longer being able to swing at all. And yet, no matter how much I search for some kind of silver lining, I can’t see it. We as a species are not taking the issues we face seriously, as mentioned above. Perhaps these problems seem too onerous, or we feel they are too large or beyond our control, so we’ll just keep our fingers crossed and hope for the best. As I wrote in my piece on Hope, this is where wishing under the guise of false optimism can be deadly. We are in a fight for our very survival and not enough people understand the severity of our plight. Though some do. Greta Thunberg is a wonderful example of this even if only a small percentage of the world’s population seems to hear her cries for greater personal responsibility.
And so, is it already a done deal and it’s now just a matter of a short amount of time before we cook ourselves into oblivion? My answer to myself is that I really don’t have an answer. But I know that as long as I’m here, along with millions of others who understand the nature of our situation, we must keep on struggling to make a difference, regardless of whether or not we have passed some unknown tipping point. While trying not to sound too much like my standard stump speech, it all comes down to our ability to drop the specific agendas we all carry around with us and focus cooperatively, as a single-minded group, on the main issue at hand: Saving Our Planet.
As I have said in other essays, we owe a tremendous debt to those who have come before, those who have left all of us a magnificent legacy. We should honor that legacy and not squander their gifts of discovery, of art, of literature, of intelligence, and of the beauty of the human spirit they have left to us. We also owe an allegiance to those who will come after us, to pass on to them a functional and livable world where they too can enjoy and relish the benefits we have inherited from our ancestors.
My wife’s coffee cup reads, “Half Full” printed on its side. She bought it to remind me that I shouldn’t continually be immersing myself in a “Half Empty” mindset. I know sometimes the old saying of “misery loves company” can be true. And it may be that I have been steeped in pessimism for so long, I don’t know of any other way to view our mutual lives, as if I’m attempting to pull people over to my way of thinking.
But I don’t believe that’s the case. I would very much like to feel the joy of a better world, to believe that 10 generations from now humanity will look back on this time and breathe a collective sigh of relief that somehow our species made it through these dark days. And so we keep a candle burning in our front window (albeit a solar powered one) to remind us it’s possible that all is not lost.
You wrote: This time it’s different.
I have to agree. The survival of my grand children, and possibly my children is entailed in the survival of the planet which collectively we are murdering as consequence of a desired way of life, and the proliferation of our species. Is this the final act in humankind’s story? There are signs… Have bad actors ever voluntarily left office when they have an obedient army at their disposal?
As you succinctly described the candle of hope, the half full cup still stands. There are communities that still subscribe to the heritage of reason, to the prospect of a humane future that cherishes the planet. Institutions too continue to live that educate the next generation in the pragmatics of love.
The future is veiled, a future that is none other than a work in progress.
How fortunate am I to still be here, and to have good work!
Keep writing!
Jerry – Your poignant response. Sometimes it’s difficult to keep in mind that, as you noted, “the future is veiled.” When I open up the paper in the morning it feels as if the demise of our species is carved in stone. The chest thumpers, the haters, the misogynists, and the xenophobic fear mongers grab the headlines and it seems as if we are swirling around the drain with no way to even slow down the insanity. As we have both said many times, we can either continue to try our best even when it feels like we’re fighting off a fire-breathing dragon using a toothpick. But we have no choice but to continue to try.
People are good, caring, empathetic, and worth caring for, even if we struggle to act collectively. Let’s not lose sight of that!
Yoni, thank you for your ray of optimism. I agree that “Most” of the world’s population is good at heart. That they want to take care of others and to better life for all of us. The darkest cloud I see at this point is our continuing degradation of the environment by a few of the uber-wealthy whose short-sighted greed may make the planet uninhabitable for everyone. I’m not sure if they have become blinded by that craving for more and more or if they are, ultimately, just stupid. Whichever it is, they have a collective power that is next to impossible to overcome, especially as the tools of technology and in particular artificial intelligence give them greater control over our ability to fight off this existential threat. I’m trying to have more positive thoughts, but it’s not easy.
The Optimism of Age
We could view it as there is no horizon line of death looming. There is only the loss of the manifestation of this body at this time. Perhaps our molecules will realign or nourish the soil and grow into another manifestation of a life.
I choose to see the best in humanity while recognizing the reality that there is a worst in humanity and we may be in a time of transformation where there is still a question of whether we are transforming into our worst selves or becoming more human, still a work in progress.
We who are awake to the world see it’s beauty first and embrace it. We who are awake to the world choose joy, grace, love, kindness over despair. We who are awake to the world see the darkness and choose the light of resistance, the light of small actions that collectively grow stronger. We recognize that we cannot fix the world alone so we find those like us that strive every day to do good, to fill the world with love over hate, to activate their hope for a better future by being active in their communities, engaging the world with positivity. This is not false hope, false positivity. We are awake and awake people need to be awake, with each other.
In growing older I choose to invest in what nourishes me, in health, in play, in love, in good trouble, in fulfilling work, in positive emotions, in relationships that nourish me, in engagements that have meaning. I choose optimism.
You may say I’m a dreamer but I’m not the only one. I invite you to choose optimism, as hard as it is, even for one day and sit in that feeling. It just might put you in a better mood.
Love you, my friend.
Well, Paul, lots to digest in your reply. Your words started me wondering about pessimism and genetics. Not that I want to blame my doom and gloom mentality on inherited traits, but it’s interesting to think about since my parents had their issues with the world in general. In this context I feel compelled to add that we are all responsible for how we act as adults. Blaming our current frame of mind on our upbringing is a complete cop out. We have a choice of what we embrace as adults, though there are times when we may also feel comfortable staying with what we know.
If I thought I could turn this dismal countenance around and put on a happy(er) face I would gladly drink whatever solution might help procure a less angst filled person. But at almost 75, my sense is that I’m stuck with this demeanor (and so are my friends if they can take being around the guy with the dark cloud over his head). And even though it may not seem like it, I am trying to let in a bit of sunshine now and then. I don’t think it’s possible to have been in a comedy improv group for 5 years and only be a Mr. Grumpy Pants. In other words, there may be some hope for me.
Thank you as always for the encouraging and kind words.
T
Yes you and I have discussed this before the issue that I have absolutely no problem with extinction. It’s the way of the world and it’s OK. I feel a bit ignorant because it was only a couple years ago when I got sick and binged a documentary on how many extinctions we’ve been through. As I said before, I love watching George Carlin on stage talking about how the Earth will ‘shake us off like a bad case of fleas’. And it should. The Earth will continue. We will not.
I understand your point, but as we discussed on the phone and as I’ve noted in several of my posts, I feel a sense of obligation to those who have given our species so many wonderful benefits, so much incredible knowledge over the history of what we call civilization. To waste all of those precious gems would be more than a shame, but perhaps it’s time for a Mulligan in terms of the alpha mammal (or other creature). For decades scientists have suggested that cockroaches might rule the planet once we’re gone.
Tobin, It seems to me there are a number of factors that aid our “insight” regarding local and world news, the majority being the advent of 24 hour news, each attempting to draw us in with he latest “Breaking news” story.
We all feel a sense of foreboding these days, so of course we are drawn to, like a moth to a flame, this continuing and never ending cycle. I say moth because the dark side of humanity sells, so what we get in essence from the news is a dude (I like visualizations) standing on a street corner with a “The end is near” sign.
Regarding nature, present events and the eventual downfall of Western civilization, I honestly don’t think there is much we can do, even collectively, to change what’s coming. Talk about pessimistic.
As you know, our modern way of life is simply not sustainable, yet we continue on as though everything will be alright. But human nature will keep us complacent to the end. Most will think that tomorrow will bring a brighter day, a new way forward in peace, happiness for all, and a greater respect for the planet we live on, but deep down inside we know our days are numbered.
In the natural world, every end creates a new beginning. We were all born from chaos, and into chaos we shall return. The question is, when society dissolves and nations crumble, what will rise from the ashes. Only time will tell.
Carl – Terrific response to my post. The thing I keep coming back to and the thing that keeps me working towards this fool’s errand of trying to make the world a better place is the debt I feel I owe to the brilliant members of the human race who have come before us, adding an incredible array to our knowledge, plus those who have sacrificed their lives in so many battles against fascism, idiocy, and religious fanaticism. I don’t want their work to be for nothing because a bunch of idiots couldn’t get past their own egotism, ignorance, and greed. I know there is a 95% chance that any efforts are too late to make a difference but I still have to try.
I agree, there have been so many men and women who have endured torment, sacrificing everything for the greater good, and it’s not right to just throw in the towel, so to speak, before the end. I know the sky is not falling, and there will be at least a few years before the proverbial feces hits the rotating blades.
So, as you stated, a 5% chance of a positive outcome is probably about right, but if we don’t keep hope for a better future alive in our hearts, there is nothing but darkness ahead. As someone eloquently stated once upon a time, every dark cloud has a silver lining.
Keeping in mind that there may be a work around with regard to humanity’s self-annihilating tendencies is the only way I feel I can keep going. Writing letters and making statements that express my frustration with our lock-step march towards extinction is my only avenue of remaining sane, other than saying “fuck it” and just enjoying what time I have left. But eschewing responsibility is not in my nature, so I continue to trudge forward, as ridiculous as it seems. I keep coming back to the old story of the boy who stuck his finger in a crack in the dyke. But I also know it’s not just me. There are millions of people who are also doing what they can to stem this lunacy, but it’s not enough. At least not yet. If there is any semblance of hope “out there” it’s the notion that those of us who are trying to make a difference are not alone.